Thursday, July 29, 2010


maybe this is me being over reacting..


but i'm scared of the fact that i didnt have any one around here

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

my wedding song


At The Beginning
We were strangers starting out on our journey
Never dreaming what we'd have to go through
Now here we are and I'm suddenly standing
At the beginning with you

No one told me I was going to find you
Unexpected what you did to my heart
When I lost hope you were there to remind me
This is the start

And Life is a road and I want to keep going
Love is a river I want to keep flowing
Life is a road now and forever
A Wonderful journey

I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there whether storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing
At the beginning with you

We were strangers on a crazy adventure
Never dreaming how our dreams would come true
Now here we stand unafraid of the future
At the beginning with you

I knew there was somebody somewhere
Like me alone in the dark
I know that my dream will live on
I've been waiting so long
Nothing's gonna tear us apart

In the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you



I see you colourful : I see you in the trees
I see you spiritful : You're in the breeze
I see it in your hands : Tree fingers draw a beam
I see you in the sand : Roll down the stream

current listening to Jónsi-Animal Arithmetic and i feel like it makes me want to blast it loud and jump around in my bedroom. this is a great song, gives me spirit and happy feeling. happy feeling! yay! two words that i most wanted to write just about this time. i dont know, things didnt go as i planned, this and that problems still come and go, but i feel.. smart. i feel better than any other day in my life. i feel like for the first time im in control of what i want. of course no one will always get what their want, but get it or not, im still good. Tir starts listening to me, tho not 100% listen and do-it-now, but at least he listened. and the best part is we started to talk. its not like we never talk before, but now, we talk as one person. good for me. my reading progress is on the way. currently reading to Breaking Down now. Chapter 16. Im making new friends too, cool people i found from facebook and twitter. i'll give you the details soon!

well, enough for now. i just miss blogging and here i am. im in the middle of my mid-test, so wish me a very best luck for that. and about 15 days to Ramadhan, right? im so excited! Ramadhan is my favorite month after March of course hehe :p Now Tir and i are planning about our new year's eve holiday to Bali with friends, so much to arrange gosh,but im not taking my part to do booking stuff,just give a little help to this and that, let the boys do the hardware stuff i guess, but still wish us a easy way to get a cheap plane tickets and hotel too okay :) and....yessss jogja photos will be posted as soon as i can! promise.

so i'll talk to you later okay.

big hugs.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

please be cool

a friend just sent me a very funny picture on bbm. She gave me a link and says "open it". Well, i have no bad thoughts about her. So i opened it and taa-raaa a close up picture of pocong appears on my screen. oh my god.

i dont know why she did that. maybe for fun which is really not funny at all. or maybe because she thought it was nothing. well, it is something. it annoyed me and scared the hell of me. congratulation!

broadcast messages or ghost picture like this really really not cool things to do. you dont have to send me "The Type of Man Who Loves You" or touching story about mother, or send me silly stuff like i would die if im not forward it to 7 friends or whatever, and please dead people cant be possible to send any message thru our phone. are you for real?

please use existing facilities as they should.

Friday, July 23, 2010



today is our one year and eight months anniversary. i am so excited! i still cant believe we made it this far. esp lately when problems hit our relationship almost everyday. everyday is me crying and he's yelling. everyday is sleep with his back in front of my face. everyday is him being pain in my ass, everyday is me being over sensitive. but everyday we grow in love more and more.

in relationship with him has changed my life. apparently there is something bigger than the box that I've lived. I knew nothing about life until I met him. i knew nothing about love until i met him. of course i cant tell you too much. he's the only thing i will never share with any one including you :p

and im sore i was the only thing in the world he wont share to anyone too. haha one year and eight moths loved by him was too good to be true. when i asked him to love me forever, he said forever is not enough. im so happy that he loves me that bad :')

i love him that bad too :p

Wednesday, July 21, 2010


hon,what are you thinking of? you look so.. confused

it was nothing, i just.. cant sleep

close your eyes,and count to three..

for you, to help you sleep..

thank you..

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

random thoughts

i really hate to write this tittle. random thoughts means im in a bad situation.

something has been bothering my mind. im worried i can tell, but not that worry. i mean, im fine, i think im going to be just fine. but it is still there, in my mind. sometimes when im alone and got nothing to do, im thinking about it. even when i dont want to think about anything. im thinking about the possibility is always there.

good for me because i dont have to thinking about it alone.well at least i thought, i dont have to thinking about it alone. i have my person here. right?

but i was wrong again. last night when i told him, i thought he would run over here and hug me and tell me everything is going to be okay. we are going to be okay. but i found him not here. he was there. i appreciate his effort to make me feel better, to make me feel im not alone. but see, im not that better.

so im thinking about any possibility that could happen. what if it really happened? where he is going to be? my answer is i dont know.

i understand why he's not here. i can take all the reason why he's not here. but i just dont know why im doing this. im scared. scared of what will happen to me and the fact that i have no one. scared of what will i do. i cant spend the rest of my life crying and hoping for someone to help me. im scared of everything.

i know right now im going to be alright. but i dont know what will happen next day.

i'll fight for you until your heart stop beating

today i went to see Eclipse with Tir. and i love it.i say so because im a twilight saga's die hard fans. not because i am the kind of girl who would die for a vampire, its more because i love the books.

im not going to tell you the story. if you have read the books or see the movie, you'll know how it goes. I will say this, even though it has been a long time since I read the books, this movie, I think, was the closest representation of them. It stuck fairly close to the story I remembered. Maybe for twilight's haters, this 2 hours movie was just like two hours of sparkly vampire goodness. but for me it was a movie.

most of girls is on Edward's team. a super handsome vampire with a very romantic dead-heart. he's cold but get so warm when he's in love. who doesnt want to be his love? yeah, me. im on Jacob's team. the werewolf one. he is.. Jacob. the hot one. the funny one. the hurt one. im not trying to act like a freak right now but i think he's good at almost everything. well, enough to describe how he is looks like. Jacob is perfect.

back to the movie, the love triangle between Edward, Bella, and Jacob was handled very well and made for some comical as well as some steamy scenes. Girls, Jacob runs around half-naked again through most of the movie, even when there was no need for him to be half-naked. Lots of eye candy there. The first kiss between Bella and Jacob, ending in her breaking her hand on his face, was a well done scene that had the audience practically falling out of their seats as they laughed. The "passing off" scene between Edward and Jacob was pretty entertaining. She goes from one hot kiss from Edward, to a half-naked Jacob who wraps her in his warm arms. The look on Edwards face was hilarious. I really enjoyed the love triangle scenes. There were some great one-liners in there too. Jacob telling Edward he was "hotter" than him, while keeping Bella from freezing to death, got a roar of laughter from everyone on the cinema, including Tir!

they touched a bit on the fact that Bella is dying to sleep with Edward and while that scene left the crowd with their own set of blue balls, the scene where Charlie and Bella attempt to discuss the "birds and bee's" gave us yet another scene to laugh at.

a thing that bothered me was the odd sound effects. When a vampire was killed they sounded like breaking glass. Now I understand that they are supposed to have skin as hard as marble, as stated in the books, but that sound effect really irked me. During the battle scenes it was everywhere. Also when they had limbs removed their insides were silvery as if like ice. I am not sure why they chose to represent them like that but it really took me out of the scene as I was trying to figure it out.

The battle scenes were kind of cool, but they were too quick to really appreciate. I'm not a big action buff so I'll leave comments to the audience on that one. Suffice to say I liked the wolves and they did a fair amount of vampire shredding. In-fact, I think they were the only ones who got to bite anyone. Again I say it ... This is a vampire flick. Let me see someone get bitten by a vampire. Sheesh!

well over all, this is the best book-to-movie adaptation movie i ever watched after Harry Potter. and this is the best romantic story i ever heard after Anna and the Kind maybe? whatever i love it and Tir loves it too. im so ready to read the next book that i already bought, Breaking Down.

Goodnight love, dont let the vampire bites you!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

dont talk to me that way

i just found out a secret about what people said about me behind my back. it was bad and really really a pain in the arse, but i dont care. i dont really care what people might say about me that i know it was wrong.
so to the people who made it up, nice try, but really you cant never hit me.

please stop being a moron.