Monday, November 30, 2009

today's report

my mom is at the hospital now.she gets ill.
something wrong with her scar after the operation.but no need to worry.the doc said,its okay.but something wrong also happened to her liver.it covered with fat. my mom said maybe its because she never controlled what she ate. so the fat grows like crazy.
the doc also said,instead of taking pills,she must do some diet and check it two months from now.

the bad news is my house maid isn't come home yet.which means i have to stayed at home babysitting my little brother and i cant go to hospital to do some deposit thing and bring stuff for mom, and i can't go to college for my graphic sketch class too. which really %&^$@^&$#^&$&#$&^$#&

well after all.i really hope my mom is alright.
xoxo

Sunday, November 22, 2009

special needs.special dreams

I am really bad in writing love letter.so pardon me if this would be the most boring love letter ever.

I made this post esp to my boyf for our anniversary.a little different from any gift I gave to him.but I need something more than goodies.I came into a dead end when it comes to this blog's blank page.I wanted to write something that will always reminds him of me.and then I started to thinking of this idea to write down the song that reminded me of him.because I love when he started mentioning a song that reminded him of me.it was so sweet.so I guess this is my turn.

Sondre Lerche-Track You Down
Reminds me of first time fell in love with him.oh it was a milion years ago!watching him walk away while I walk behind him.he was a question mark back then.I'm so thrilled to found out more and more about him.i know it was such a crime for me to do flirt with him year ago.but i just cant help my self not to do an eye on eye on him!and im glad he was mine right now.

CameraObscura-all tracks
Reminds me of singing along with him whenever we are at.hugging him tight as it was still in first month since he became mine.he loves all the songs too and we kept singing all over again.I was in lowest disappointment when i found out that he gave one of my song to his friend who had flirt with him.I used to cry my self all night.i hate hate hate hate hate it the most.

Pulp-the best of album
Reminds me of doing nothing in his room.my boyf's room is a shit doods!!getting bored and laugh at each other and we'd take a stupid photos on his laptop.i'd love to post all them all but they are like a milion of stupid photos.here's the cute one!

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Arcady oh Arcady
Reminds me of his fb's status updates and being around him.he used to listen to the song from his phone so it also reminds me of adoring the way he answer my phone call.

There're still lotta of songs.but I won't share them all because i might running all blog's caracter!haha.

Its so sad for me knowing that he never read my blog.I hate to say the fact that almost all my posts're about how I'm in love with him.how he got me right on my heart.yesterday,our relationship hitting the rock.he said a thing like can't put his trust on me because he afraid that I will cheating on him again.I felt so blue and regretted that I couldn't make him just believe.I thought by writing all my feeling for him on my blog could make him realize and believe even just a bit..

Well.happy anniversary once again love.. I love you :)

xoxo

Friday, November 20, 2009

damn,

i hate the fact that almost all my posts were always about my relationship.

fyi,mine is hitting the rock again and again.i won't give you any major details but yes,it makes me keep singing emo songs all day long. i'm bit regretted always proud about him,i don't know but now,i feel like i'm on the bottom line of my heartbroken feeling.
it's like he never understand or even try to understand how i'm from head to toe in love with him.all he think about are just how i broke his heart and i wont be forgiven for the rest of my life.that im the most untrusted girl in his whole world.i'm in deep disappointment right now.
i hate mostly when he said he forget to see me and doesnt even have a minute to text me. whats that supposed to mean?
all i want is just a special place on his heart and a sprig of trusted.


i know that you probably read this after a million days after i wrote this post,but i hope you always know that you did broke my heart.i love you but once again careless is not for me,so maybe its better for you to get lost

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

PHOTO SERIES

these photographs taken when we're in our vacation.still not all but im looking foward to uploading the others very soon.i loved to share everysingle fun we had to you all. enjoy cupcakes!
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i fell in love with this city.maybe for some people,this city has no different with the others big cities in Indonesia such as Jakarta or Bandung.but for me, i get a new atmosphere here.too bad,i don't have much time and enough money to get around the city.

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these are the special ones about the city.don't you love it skies?these are the reason for me to get back to this city as soon as possible.yet,i'm a bit regretted not taking pictures of Malioboro,but over all i'm very happy to be here.

once again,thank you tirto.

ps:perhaps for some future posts i will keep uploading some pictures about jogja.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

In Our Shoes Crossing The Border Line

hello!welcome to our vacation to Jogjakarta and Dieng.finally yeah!a vacation!even though my desire to go to Lombok couldn't be fullfilled,im so thrilled that Tirto kept his promise to take me on a vacation away from home where i dont have to think about college and any short of responsibilities.
so our trip started by 8.Lodaya train straight to Jogjakarta.its my first time to Jogja after 10 years.so waw!
its almost 11 when i wrote this.so here i am on the train.im starving to death and so boring :( it takes 9 hours to Jogja and it costs 90000idr.Tirto was sleeping all along the way.so well,i decided to start writing so i can share my vacation to all my friends. :)
okay.from where i am sited,the view that i'm offer is remarkably black.but then,i could see 1,2,3 cute little lamps.is it from a house or what,i dont have a any idea.because all i see is black.
there're people on my train. i could see their different faces. sleeping, talking to each other, watching the night from the window, staring at nothing. ahh i wish i could get their picture :(
11.10 here i am on Ciamis Station.5 hours to go.maybe i should try to sleep now..

its 4.15 and voila. i proudly present give you my jogjakarta :)
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finally i am here!


like i said before. im starving to death. so first thing is looking for food! walking around at Malioboro Street this early was so cool.no one else but us.dont be jealous people, but its like we owned the world.so after walking 5-10 minutes,we decided to buy bubur ayam for breakfast.a very welcomed hug from Jogja for me.

our next destination is Dieng Plateau. but before that, we must buy our ticket for sunday to Bandung. so we waited so long until 7 for the reservation box. tirto wrote something funny on my notes!i'll post in for sure!

the way to Dieng started by 8.we took the bus number 4 to terminal.it costs 3000idr.from terminal we continued to Magelang it costs 8000idr and it takes about one and half hour.the weather was so damn hot.i cant help my self from sweating.but thank god,i fell a sleep heavenly.from Magelang we took bus to Wonosobo.it costs 14000idr but it takes like forever!hahaha. 2 hours to Wonosobo plus hot temperature were crazzzzyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant stop complained to Tirto.sorry love :p
from Wonosobo to Dieng costs 12500idr but oh my god,i love everysingle thing about the view on my way to Dieng..

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Dieng Plateau,The City of Lost



i have found my own paradise.

November 13. What a day.i arrived on my own paradise, Dieng for the very first time. Dieng Plateau is a marshy plateau that forms the floor of a caldera complex on the Dieng active volcano complex, and is located near Wonosobo, Central Java, Indonesia.It is the site for eight small Hindu temples from the 7th and 8th centuries, the oldest Hindu temples in Central Java, and the first known standing stone structures in Java. They are originally thought to have numbered 400 but only 8 remain. The Dieng structures were small and relatively plain, but stone architecture developed substantially in only a matter of decades resulting in masterpieces such as the Prambanan complex and Borobudur.
The first thing that i thought was how cold the weather is.i'm freezing.but nothing can describe how i felt when i first put step to this place.damn excited!

After get a room for stayed one night.im going out!firstly, i took ojek to the Hindu Temples. i was amaze. this place, sooo green and clean.its like a spiritual trip for me even though im not a Hindus. I cant stop being amazed with how clean is this place.it was soooooo beautiful.everything was so green.all i saw was green colors surrounding my eyes.


The Hindu Temples


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Kawah Sikidang


too bad i missed Telaga Warna.People said it was so beautiful.but the rains are pouring in.

i felt like on my own world where no one can found me there.i might be in the lost city far far away from the daily thing i used to do.but i share a lot of happiness here.with the world, the history, the spiritual, the people, and Tirto for sure.

next day,we came back to Jogja and stayed for one day.i wont wrote the details,but im having a great time. Shopping and eating so full of joy.i seriously had so much fun.
i'll post more photos soon.it is too late now,and i need to go to bed.
im looking forward to travel again maybe with you.

Thank you Hilman Adin Manda Aldot and Tirto for sure.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

suicidal night.

okay.i need a break.
and i need to curse on something.
i feel superduper tired with my latest dkv assignment.its 4 in the morning and i still have lotta cute little pic i have to draw.what a great great night.im starving oh no no no no.
my friends are sleeping now..i need to go to bed to,but god i hate to say that i can't go to bed right now.my friend's songs list are sooooo emo.makes me feel a little mellow and yeeeeeah i still need to curse on something.
im current listening to something bla bla to mars. ha ha ha what an emo night.
just a short updates. i hope everyone reads this have a better night than me. than us.
i think i'll fuck my self again.
i'll post the photos of the deadly night soon. or dont be shy to check them on @marcelitarinda at twitter.

i have a lot of things to share still looking for free times to write. i feel a lil uncreative and trashy now a days..
yes god, i need a break.

suicidal night.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

THE HEARTBREAK KID

i never felt this lonely before..
am i living as someone that i'm not? i feel like now people are shooting different names with different faces.i feel like swimming in the ocean of mistakes i made.now i'm drowning in regret.
i have not been my self lately in my relationship.it's like i'm doing orders and do everything under his control.glad those days are over right now.but back there,it always been a mad problem for me when it comes to speak to him.like the thousand words slipping thru my lips.my voice won't come out.
is it normal for a girl like that?
like when you care about someone so much.you'd give everything for them.but at the end of the day,you start to realize that does this person care about you too?
i have been on that feeling like a million times.
i always been killing my self just try to make someone that i loved happy.i give everything to make him happy.time,money,heart and soul,everything and anything.that's all i've been doing in every relationship i made.maybe i'm a terrible bitch for friendship,a lil sentimental too but not mention a love relationship.
i care so much until i forget to care about my self.
now i'm sinking.
why should we try so fucking hard to care?
geez.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

instant

it is been quite long since the last time i wrote trashy words here. by the way, my relationship with Tirto getting better now. i finally begun to speak up my mind. and i hope he's alright with that. i have a lotta things to tell you but i am little busy here. my dkv assignment is totally fuck me up and i catch a very bad cold. huu. 'll write some more when i have free times. im looking foward to do blogwalking and uploading so i can share them with all of my friends.
GOOD DAY NOVEMBER!!